Happy Halloween From Author Davis Aujourd'hui and His Zany Characters

Have a Safe and Fun Halloween!

                                                        From Millan.Net

How Jules Jesslike Pappas Got His Name by author David Aujourd’hui

Part1 from Literal Exposure

What’s in a name? After all, every name has its own special meaning. It’s just that for the characters in "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude", the meanings of their names tend to have a humorous tale. Sometimes the meaning of those names is obvious as in the case of Fartley Dinkledorf. He is a flatulent child who takes great and perverse pleasure in passing gas. Sometimes it’s not so obvious as in the case of Jules Jesslike Pappas. Let me tell you the tale behind his name.

Jules’ mother was a simple-minded woman who had a rather impulsive nature. I prefer to call her a free spirit, though some of the characters of Bucksnort, Wisconsin might be inclined to judge her. The prudish Priscilla Bunhead would be a case in point.

Irregardless, Mae I. Doomutch was a woman who embraced her sexuality. As a child Mae would always be asking the question, “May I do this or that?” As an adult, she would respond with a resounding “Yes!”

Mae was indeed doing much on the night of Jules’ conception. She just happened to have relations with men of two different races on that evening. Nine months later, Mae gave birth to a little girl. She also gave birth to Jules. It’s just that the girl popped out looking like creamy vanilla whereas Jules popped out with the complexion of milk chocolate.

When the nurse held up the little baby with the not-so-little member, Mae was reminded of his overly-endowed father. The nurse asked Mae, “What will you name him, dear?”


Mae took one look at the baby’s gigantic jewels and exclaimed, “Jewels just like pappa’s!” The nurse proceeded to record the baby’s name on the birth certificate. That name read as Jules Jesslike Pappas.

Take a delightful and hilarious trip to Bucksnort and meet some of the other zany characters. You’ll meet Fartley’s grandfather, Diddles, and his great-grandfather, the one-hundred five year-old Poopsy Dinkledorf.


You’ll arch your back when you meet the irascible Martha Mayhem. You’ll pop your cork when Priscilla Bunhead starts her campaign called BUN which stands for Bunheads Unite Now. It is basically an organization for ladies against women. Priscilla gets into unending altercations with Martha and her other neighbor, the voluptuous and sensual Lula Mae Bunsaplenty.

The good news about the characters of Bucksnort is that they will continue to have ongoing misadventures. This book is just the first in a series of social and religious satires. "Babes in Bucksnort" (book 2 of the Sister Mary Olga Series) 

In the meantime, check out the rave reviews on "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude" on Amazon.com. While there, do yourself and your friends a favor. Buy a copy of the book for an endless series of laughs and pass the joy around. Then keep coming back to this blog to find out when other misadventures will be about to appear. I promise to provide you with a decade or more of belly laughs.

"The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga"(Book 1) is on sale at Amazon in Paperback for $13.95 and you can purchase HERE! Available in Kindle Format for $3.99 and you can purchase HERE!

"Babes in Bucksnort" (Book 2) is on sale at Amazon in Paperback for $13.95 and you can purchase Here! Available in Kindle Format for $3.99 and you can purchase HERE!

MEET DIMPLES DUFUS AND HER NOT SO DARLING DIMPLES II

Dimples Mayflower Dufus had just celebrated her forty-fifth birthday. It hadn’t turned out to be exactly the kind of celebration that she had been expecting. She had arrived home early on the night of the surprise party which she’d demanded for herself. As a matter of fact, she had actually ended up getting herself a surprise. She had found her husband, Rufus, diddling a purple-headed dingbat on the side of their Olympic-sized swimming poo

The very next day she had filed for a divorce from Rufus Dufus. Then she had prepared for a long battle because she had intended to get every nickel of Rufus’ inheritance. That’s when she had found out what Rufus had been doing with their money whenever he’d gone away on a “business trip.” He’d been wining and dining ladies of the night and he’d been spending his own family’s fortune at the roulette tables.

When it had come out that Rufus had even mortgaged away their villa, Dimples had decided to go home to the mother whom she hadn’t seen in fifteen years in order to claim her rightful inheritance. That’s when she had ditched her married name of Dufus and had packed up the only things that she’d had left. That would have been her extensive jewelry collection and a wardrobe that could have filled a modest home. Then, along with her darling Dimples II, she had headed back home to Bucksnort.

Dimples had been a beautiful little blond-haired baby. Her towhead had changed to dark brown by the time she had turned nineteen and had married for the first time. Ever since those days, she’d had her
hairdresser make a weekly trip to touch up her three-color-process dye job at whatever mansion or villa in which she’d resided .

She'd had her boobs enlarged when she’d been twenty-five. That had helped her snag husband number two, the father of Dimples II. Having been a sun goddess to the extreme, she’d had her first face-lift done at the age of thirty-eight to get rid of her sun crinkles. By that time she’d also needed liposuction to get rid of all the pounds of fat she’d put on.

At least she’d had years of gourmet meals and fine wines to thank for that. Of course, she’d also managed to keep her full service bar restocked on a weekly basis. She’d been even thirstier than I! Unfortunately for Dimples, she hadn’t been thirsty for God. She had only been thirsty for whatever God could have done for her.

Dimples had given herself an early forty-fifth birthday present. That had been another face-lift. Unfortunately for Dimples, Dr. Peter Pimplehead had decided to get a little revenge on the beauties who had spurned him in his past. The delicate and darling Dimples was going to become his scapegoat.

When the bandages had been removed from Dimples’ previously perfect face, she had let out a shriek. Dr. Pimplehead had pulled her skin tighter than that of Joan Rivers.

There wasn’t a thing that could be done. There had been no skin left that could have been used to loosen her perpetual look of amazement. Perhaps, after she’d looked at herself in the mirror many times, she would have found other things to be amazed about. How about God, darling Dimples?

One thing was true about Dimples. She was a delicate-looking creature. It’s just that, in her case, her behavior was more like a “creature” than it was like “delicate.” Unlike her mother, Dimples II hadn’t been as blessed in the beauty department. Her broad and upswept cheekbones cast a downward slant on her wide-set eyes. That little girl also had an extremely large mouth in more ways than one, I can assure you!

Her hair was a wiry, mousy-brown, just like that of her Great Aunt Martha when she had been a young girl. She also seemed to inherit Aunt Martha’s gene for short and stout. Nevertheless her mother, Dimples, believed that her daughter was a beauty. Granted, Dimples II wouldn’t be winning the little girl beauty pageants in which her mother had captured many a crown.

There was one thing that this mother and daughter had in common. They were both a couple of spoiled princesses. It’s just that, for Dimples II, her unfortunate looks only served to become a chip upon her shoulder. It was also a chip that would soon become the same size as the chip on the shoulder of her Great Aunt Martha.

As I was saying, little Dimples II wasn’t so little anymore. She had just turned fourteen and she carried more than ten times that much weight on her broad five-foot frame. God had blessed her in one department; she had a chest that would be likely to give her back problems by the time she would become twenty-five. Given her short stature, her chest appeared even more mammoth. That “little” girl had already discovered how to use that to her advantage. I’m certain we’ll hear more about that once she discovers the budding adolescent boys of Bucksnort!

Author Davis Aujourd'Hui
 
Book Series"
Book #1 "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude"
Book #2 "Babes in Bucksnort"

Both are available in Kindle Format for $3.99

New Book Review: Humor! The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude" By Author Davis Aujourd'hui

By Dorothy Thompson on July 22, 2011 at 3:00 pm


Davis Aujourd’hui is touring in October 2011 with his humor novel, The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude.

Are you ready for a class in Advanced Holiness for people from all walks of life? Then, perhaps you’re ready to take a trip to the Have A Heart convent in Bucksnort, Wisconsin. There, you’ll meet a nun you’re not likely to forget – Sister Mary Olga Fortitude.

The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude is a satire with a spiritual message, but there’s a lot of hanky panky going on here. Sister Mary Olga is an irreverent nun who has some unique spiritual views that differ from those of the Pope. She’s a great believer of “to each, one’s own.” She also loves her Marlboros and her bourbon. Just don’t let the Reverend Mother in on her secret. The next class in Advanced Holiness may be canceled.

Here in Bucksnort, you’ll meet a zany cast of all-too-human characters. There’s a lot of secret-keeping going on here, but Sister Mary Olga will be sure to deliver the goods in order to provide you with good and bad examples of holiness.

The Reverend Mother is a former prostitute. The convent’s chef is a gay cowboy. Priscilla Bunhead is the town busybody who opens some other closet doors. She, along with the other folks on Dinkledorf Drive, serve up examples of what not to do.

One thing’s for sure. These characters will lighten your load and help you to not take life so seriously. Get ready for non-stop laughs!

Babes in Bucksnort:

Babes in Bucksnort is the first sequel to the highly praised The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude. Once again the unconventional bourbon-swilling, chain-smoking nun will spin outrageously funny new tales about the residents of Bucksnort, Wisconsin while she tests the will of a reformed prostitute who just happens to be her Reverend Mother.

Unfortunately there’s trouble brewing in the Snortlands. The nasty and notorious town busybody, Priscilla Bunhead, goes on a crusade to stamp out what she calls the gay menace. That’s when she convinces her millionaire friend, Mildred Mayflower, to give away her fortune in order to bring the Reverend Billy-Bob Blunthead and his Born Again or Burn Forever Disciples for Jesus to town to do the job. It will be an uphill climb for them when the closet doors of many gay people in the Snortlands burst open. Billy-Bob and his wife, Pinky Poo, will have another battle on their hands when Dimples Dufus, the heiress to the Mayflower fortune, arrives on the scene to reclaim her fortune.

You’ll also meet the hilariously bumbling, pothead psychiatrist, Doctor Wally Wacky-Wacko, who creates havoc for one of Sister Mary Olga’s favorite fellow nuns. Along with Mildred Mayflower, they become victims of his multi-colored pills that only turn them into zombies. The handsome and virile gay cowboy chef, Randy Cowboy, makes an important self-discovery about his never-ending sexual pursuits when he joins a twelve-step program called Sex Maniacs Notorious.

The irascible Martha Mayhem settles down into comfortable domesticity with her new life partner who happens to be her sister-in law. Martha still manages to stir up trouble on Dinkledorf Drive with her fellow enemies and neighbors, the prudish Priscilla Bunhead and the voluptuous Lula Mae Bunsaplenty. The question that remains is whether Lula Mae’s paramour, Jules Jesslike Pappas will put up with her continuing manipulative feminine wiles.

In between the laughs, Sister Mary Olga continues to dispense nuggets of spiritual wisdom during her classes in Beginner’s and Advanced Holiness. Just don’t take seats near the flatulent child named Fartley Dinkledorf or his lecherous one-hundred five year-old grandfather, Poopsy. The bottom line is that everyone is welcome in Sister Mary Olga’s classes. Join the diverse cast of zany characters for a joy ride that will tickle your funny bone until it aches.

A Teaser…

Speaking of looking up, that brings me to the subject of Sister Samantha’s secret. Lord, have mercy! Well now! I was extremely thirsty following my most recent week of penance on my knees in my humble little cell; so, I’d made a hasty visit to Randy Cowboy who was generous enough to give me a half gallon of Jack Daniel’s.


I threw caution to the wind and I ducked into cubicle number four where I began to have a few nips. Oh, I must confess the truth. I tied one on! By the time I’d passed out, I’d managed to refresh myself with almost half of that big bottle. Oh my!


Sometime during the night, I must have slipped off the toilet and landed on the floor. I didn’t wake up until the following morning; and, I must say, I had quite a headache! I also realized that I had partially slid under cubicle number three; and, I couldn’t get up.


Well, wouldn’t you know it, the restroom door burst open and I immediately thought that the gig was up. With my luck, I thought that it might be Mother Carmen and that I’d be sent back to my cell for another week of solitary confinement.


Fortunately, God spared me that ordeal and He had sent me an angel. It was Sister Samantha. Of course, I didn’t find that out immediately. Let’s just say that we both had a big surprise in store!


Well! There I was, with my head under cubicle number three, when I heard Sister Samantha singing Amazing Grace as she entered that very cubicle! Apparently, she was so moved by the Holy Spirit that she didn’t even notice my head facing up toward her toilet.


I closed my eyes in reverent prayer just as she was lowering her panties. As she was preparing to sit upon her throne, her habit swished over my face which brought me to attention. I opened my eyes by reflex. Boy, did I get an eyeful and I do mean boy! Sister Samantha wasn’t a woman! Lord, have mercy!


Well! It was a rather awkward situation to say the least! I had learned of Sister Samantha’s incredible secret. I also needed her help. What could I do, but gently murmur, “Please help me, Sister. I’ve fallen and I can’t get up.”


Let me tell you, Sister Samantha might not have been a woman, but she let out a high-pitched scream that sounded like a woman giving birth. She jumped off her pot and she whooshed her habit off my pleading face. If anyone else could have seen us at that very moment, I’m sure that both of our faces would have appeared beet red.


Well! If either of us had had a blackmailing bone in our bodies, we both would have had sufficient ammunition to use against the other. Suffice it to say, each of us took a higher path except Sister Samantha had the higher advantage at that moment.


Well, that little woman proved to be very strong. She grabbed me under my arms. Then she pulled me right under the partition of cubicle number three and out onto the restroom floor.


Even though I was feeling very shaky, in more ways than one, I managed to get myself up and onto my wobbly legs. Well, what could I say besides, “Thank you;” however, given the situation, it seemed that something else might be in order.


I felt rather like Little Red Riding Hood when she discovered that her grandmama was actually a wolf. The nice thing about my situation was that Sister Samantha wasn’t about to eat me up. I decided right then and there that I wasn’t going to give her up.


“Sister,” I said. “How did you ever pull it off?”


That’s when she told me her story. You see, Sister Samantha just happened to have been born in the wrong body. She was really every bit as much of a woman as myself with one notable exception. God sure works in mysterious ways!

Sister Samantha was the most beautiful child. She was christened “Bobby O’Reilly” and she was her mother’s only son. As it had turned out, he was her only daughter too.


Mother and child lived with Bobby’s grandmother on the family farm. He was conceived on Christmas Eve and he was born on the harvest moon of the following year. It was a fruitful harvest, in more ways than one! He was his mother’s pride and joy as well as being the favorite grandchild of his elderly grandmother. Little Samantha or, should I say, little Bobby was a perfect angel.


On his first day of school, his mother dressed him up in knickers and she sent him off to the Baptist academy in his hometown which was located in a little parish similar to our own. When he returned from school, both his mother and grandmother were in for a big surprise.


Little Bobby had discovered the academy’s Good Will clothes closet and he had decided to change his outfit. When he returned to his grandmother’s farm, he was wearing a dress, high heels, and he had braided his long locks into a perfect French braid.

Grandma O’Reilly chastened her daughter by exclaiming, “Whatever possessed you to send Bobby to school like that?”


Bobby’s dumbfounded mother simply stared at her son and said, “I didn’t!”


That was just the beginning. By the time Bobby was in high school, he had run off to the big city and he had started living as a woman. He had the most gorgeous natural female breasts and he began to receive hormone shots that made him the envy of the big city drag queens.


He named himself Samantha Monet and he decided to seek fame and fortune as a female impersonator. With his new female voice, he could hit a high C and he was soon performing in the big city clubs and making big money.


One of his favorite routines involved him dressing as a nun. It only seemed fitting since he had converted to Catholicism and he had decided that, once he’d had a taste of the world, he was going to become a nun. Sister Samantha was a smashing success as she wooed the crowds with her renditions of religious songs that soon won converts to her beloved Savior.


Sister Samantha was planning on having a sex change, but a part of her believed she was born in a man’s body to teach the world a lesson in tolerance of those who are different from others. Well! Sister Samantha had already taught me a lesson!

Please note that this is only available in Paperback and Kindle formats.

Thank you!

Great Reading for People That would like to sit down and have a great laugh!

Kind words about Author Davis Aujourd'hui and his first book of the "Sister Mary Olga" Satire Series"



From The Publisher: "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude" (Book 1 of Series)

Author Davis Aujourd'hui:

Your narrative voice is FANTASTIC. Reading through your work was like sitting across from you and having a cup of coffee.

I really enjoyed it!

Your work demonstrates strong writing with a nice flow.

You really have done a nice job putting together your book. Your writing proves you did your homework before writing your story as your story line flows so nicely.

Your book is written well and I have to say that there were times I wondered if I was reading fiction or nonfiction.

Congratulations! 


Tinamarie Ruvalcaba
Author Representative
Outskirts Press



Book 1 - " The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude"

Available in Paperback and Kindle Format! Kindle Special Pricing $3.99

Meet All the Colorful and Entertaining Characters of Buscksnort!

Lights! Camera! Action!
Roll Bucksnort!
Here are some zany, fun-loving townspeople you will not soon forget!
You’re guaranteed to laugh, at times even uncontrollably, but you’ll come away from the Sister Mary Olga Series with a definite smile on your face wanting more.

Bucksnort is a little community tucked away in Wisconsin, like any other little town you would find somewhere across the country. It is filled with individuals who offer their words of wisdom, lifestyle, and beliefs through hilarity and laughter. They may not all get along or agree with the same personal views, but they may surprise you with their actions.

Here’s only a few of the characters you’ll find in I, all without spoilers of course!
Sister Mary Olga FortitudeShe needs no introduction. She’s the holy glue that holds the town together. Well, you might be surprised that she smokes Marlboros and swigs some of the unholy Bourbon cleverly hidden in her crucifix.

Sister SamanthaThe sweet, cherub faced sister with a lot on her mind. She had confessed her love to someone close. Will they reciprocate her love?

Reverend Mother Carmen
She knows that there’s something a foot in the convent, but not sure what it is yet. She’s going to get to the bottom of it.

Father Cowberries
He and Sister Mary Olga have much in common and have show and tell quite often.

Randy Cowboy
He’s the convent’s chef and has some serious decisions to make about his life and relationships. What shall he do?

Diddles DinkledorfTrying to keep his mind from his troubles and from a man by the name of Mark Mayhem, he busies himself by making crucifixes for the local sisters.

Lilliliver LipstickShe easily spreads gossip throughout Bucksnort. But will she be redeemed?

Dr. Wally Wacky-Wacko
He may be a doctor, but rarely wants to engage in any real work, he only looking for his next victims, oops, I mean clients. He’s been bribed to declare one of the townies to be not fit to handle her money. Will anyone catch on to his shenanigans?

Priscilla Bunhead
She has sounded a great alarm and arranged a meeting of Citizens United for Decency and Citizens for a Better Bucksnort on Dinkledorf Drive. It’s difficult to keep a secret from this busybody. What will she do next? Will she turn the entire town against them?

Dimples MayflowerShe has only her own personal fortune to look after, namely her spent inheritance. She’s on the rampage against Reverent Billy-Bob Blunthead for taking her mother’s money. It should have been hers! She’s going to seek the help of the law firm of Fiddledee and Fiddledum.

Reverend Billy-Bob BluntheadBucksnort has been blindsided by this fast taking, theatrical reverend and the Born Again or Burn Forever Disciples for Jesus. Will his words of burning in hell convince the town to run out all of the so-called “undesirables” and “gay menace”?

Pinky Poo Blunthead
The lovely, exuberant wife of the reverend that adds drama to the sermons as she is dressed in brightly colored pink suits and faints, at the most appropriate time of course, with the most melodramatic flair.

And last but certainly not least…

Fartley Dinkledorf
Well… I think that he is fairly self-explanatory.

What happens in Bucksnort will stay in Bucksnort until you turn the funny pages of "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude" (book #1) and "Babes in Bucksnort" (book #2).

All this and much more laughter to come from Author Davis Aujourd'hui !

Both are available in Papeback and Kindle Format. Kindles are priced at  $3.99

Book 2 of Sister Mary Olga Book Series -"Babes in Bucksnort" - Amazon Deals for Cyber Monday!

"Babes in Bucksnort" (Book 2 of The Sister Mary Olga Book Series)





About the Author - Davis Aujourd'hui

Davis Aujourd'hui is my pen name for the Sister Mary Olga Fortitude Series. Besides "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude," . I have already completed nine other books in the series and I plan to keep them coming. "Babes in Bucksnort" is Book 2 of the Series. .

I am a new author, yet I possess a rich life experience that has enabled me to draw from it in order to create a colorful canvas upon which to paint very human lives. I am a retired social worker, having worked for Adult Protective Services in New York State for nearly twenty years.

What Makes You Happy?

Having lunch with good friends? Taking a nice long walk on the beach at sunset? Or, helping others who are less fortunate than you?


In my new book "Babes in Bucksnort", Sister Mary Olga has some wisdom into happiness and the best life you can possibly enjoy that I’d like to share with you.

“Now! I’m here today to tell you that it’s time to wake up and repent. This is the season of Jesus’s resurrection. Now, as always, he is here among us to lead us all to a better life. All it takes is to make a change in your attitude. Then you shall find yourself back on the High Way to God.”

How many times have you asked yourself, what makes me happy?

It’s the little things in life that seem to hold the most importance and happiness to us. It can be just a time that you went for a nature walk and you noticed the earth’s beauty for the first time, watched a baby take their first steps, or laughed until you cried with an old friend.

Take the time to enjoy life, the little joys and laughter, and change your perspective on the negative things that seem to bombard us everyday.

Sister Mary Olga says, “Perhaps you’d rather listen to some of my stories about the babes in Bucksnort and learn from their successes or their mistakes. Now! Wouldn’t it be easier than taking the elevator down that deep, dark shaft to a place of despair? All it takes is to be true to yourselves. Then God shall reveal all to you. Keep the focus on yourself and let the rest of the world go its own way.”

Remember, when you sit back and laugh, don’t forget to dip your toe in the water. You never know what wonderful things will transpire from that simple gesture.

Check out Babes in Bucksnort to find out the new adventures in the town of Bucksnort and what other wisdoms that Sister Mary Olga has to share with you along the way.

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

Sister Mary Olga Book Series:
Book 1 "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude"
Book 2 "Babes in Bucksnort"

PRISCILLA BUNHEAD MEETS LILLILIVER LIPSTICK

Priscilla was the town prude and busybody. Lately, she had found ripe pickings among some of her new neighbors. They were none other than the Snatchasnitches. The most vulnerable member of that family
was none other than Lilliliver Lipstick.

Priscilla presented the Snatchasnitches with one of her famous sour cream cakes on the very day after they had moved into the neighborhood. Prissy needed all of the support she could get for her causes. She was still trying to regain ground after Sister Samantha had infiltrated one of her BUN meetings. BUN just happens to stand for Bunheads Unite Now.

Ever the good student of poor fashion, Lilliliver Lipstick was a prime candidate for a strangled bun with which to control her stringy dishwater hair. She was also a good candidate to be controlled by someone who could do her thinking for her.

Prissy rang the Snatchasnitch’s doorbell and was greeted by Abner and Lilliliver’s little Senorita. At least our little Senorita had some good sense, though she was lacking in the manners department. There before her stood a scrawny, prune-faced lady who looked as if she’d been sucking on lemons.

Senorita took one look at this woman who had about as much hair as a church mouse. Then she exclaimed, “You’re the ugliest old lady I’ve ever seen!”

Prissy nearly shoved her sour cream cake right into little Senorita’s smug face until she remembered that she was on a mission. That’s when Lilliliver Lipstick quickly appeared and said to Senorita, “Now, now, sweetie, that’s not a very nice thing to say to an old lady.”

Priscilla was still on the fence about where her cake should end up. She chose the higher road and she presented it to Lilliliver Lipstick as she said, “Welcome to Dinkledorf Drive! I wanted to be the first one to roll out the welcome mat to you. May I come in for a moment?”

Lilliliver gave Priscilla a smile that reminded Priscilla of some of the insecure girls in her former etiquette classes for young ladies. Then Lilliliver admitted Prissy to her own perfect and prissily-kept home before she offered Priscilla a perfectly-fluffed, aqua-colored arm chair.

Priscilla took in the surroundings and the chair with an approving smile. Aqua had always been her favorite color. Besides, having recently become a retired home economics teacher, she was always pleased to see a young woman who took her domestic chores seriously. Then she craftily led the conversation around to her latest campaign.

She lowered her high-strung voice into nearly a whisper when she said, “My dear, I think I should warn you about some of your new neighbors. Evil lurks in the neighborhood. Why, the house just two doors down from you is inhabited by a couple of lesbians! You must protect your little Senorita against their evil influences. You wouldn’t want her to turn out like that, now would you?”

Lilliliver shuddered at the thought as she feverishly squirmed in her own seat. Then she exclaimed, “Oh my heavens, no!”

Priscilla continued on. “I also think that you should know that we have a couple of Negroes on the block. Now, the old man, Jules Jesslike Pappas, is really a credit to his race, but he’s living in sin with a lazy, dark-skinned, good-for-nothing floozy named Lula Mae Bunsaplenty. I’d been so concerned for our neighborhood when she’d moved in. Thank goodness it hasn’t kept fine upstanding white folks like you from buying a home here!”

Lilliliver appeared disturbed. She hadn’t realized that there had been any Negroes in the neighborhood. That’s when she exclaimed, “They don’t have any boys, do they?”

“Oh no, my dear!” Prissy continued. “Jules and Lula Mae don’t have any children and I sincerely doubt that they ever will. Their relationship seems to be on the rocks. At least you won’t have to worry about your little girl being pursued by an oversexed black boy. Even so, we need to make sure that they don’t attract any other Negroes into our beautiful neighborhood!”

“Certainly not!” Lilliliver exclaimed. “I’ll be sure to warn Abner about the situation!”

Priscilla continued on as she said, “I’m afraid there’s one more neighbor on whom you’re going to have to keep an eye if you don’t want him keeping an eye on you. He’s really a pretty harmless old man named Poopsy Dinkledorf. Why, the man is over one hundred years-old, but he’s also a dirty old man and a Peeping Tom!”

Lilliliver quickly retorted, “Well, he’s not going to get a chance with me because I always keep my blinds closed!”

“That’s very wise, my dear,” replied a self-satisfied Priscilla. “Even so, I might suggest that you remain vigilant and peek out your blinds on a regular basis. You can always come running over to my house if you see anything that we should be concerned about.”

Lilliliver quickly went over to her window blinds where she parted them before she peered out in all directions. Priscilla smiled at her action. “Oh, Miss Bunhead,” Lilliliver whimpered. “I just can’t believe that we’re surrounded by perverts and Negroes! I can’t thank you enough for warning me! I feel so much more secure knowing that I’m going to have a good friend like you in order to help protect my little Senorita.”

“Well, there’s one other thing that you can do in order to help protect your little darling,” replied Priscilla who nearly spat out her last word upon remembering that perfectly wretched child. “I’ve formed a new organization called CUDDD. That stands for Citizens United for Decency on Dinkledorf Drive. We just happen to be having our first meeting tonight. I’m counting on you for your support.”

“Oh my, yes!” declared Priscilla’s newest hand puppet. “I’ll be sure to be there!”

“That’s a good girl,” purred Priscilla. “Now, it’s time for me to go!” With that said, she wormed her way out of her chair, took her leave, and she skittered across the street to her own lookout station.

Author Davis Aujourd'Hui

Sister Mary Olga Book Series
Book #1 "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude"
Book #2 "Babes in Bucksnort"

"Laugh, Learn & Love" Book Review of "Babes In Bucksnort" June 11, 2010

Book Reviews of "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude" and "Babes in Bucksnort"
By A Very Merry Shakespeare (NY, NY) 


This review is from: Babes in Bucksnort: Sister Mary Olga Fortitude Book 2 (Paperback)

Guys and gals - if you want to laugh out loud, and learn something at the same time, this is the book for you. Series of books, actually; the first book in this great set that I received in the mail was titled "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude". Now, Sister Mary Olga dwells at the Have a Heart convent in Bucksnort, Wisconsin. She is a true spiritual guide for everyone, and it shouldn't matter that she also has two things she loves - Marlboros and bourbon. When I began the first book, I quickly and completely fell into it and could not put it down; I was so entranced with the people on Dinkledorf Drive that I, literally, fell in love with each adn every one of them. I also was impressed at the way the author addressed many issues pertinent to the world today including religion and gay rights.


I moved on to the second book almost immediately because I was, by then, so wrapped up in these characters that I was laughing at a time when I truly needed to laugh and I wanted my happiness (and stress-relief) to continue. In the second novel, Priscilla Bunhead is one of those people that every small town in America has; she is the righteous busy body who can't stand the fact that there are atrocities in her world such as gay people infiltrating her town. She goes on a crusade, with the help of her millionaire friend, to call forth the wise and righteous Reverend Billy-Bob Blunthead. This is the man who will clean up her town and force the gay people out of her neck of the woods. Not only do we have that storyline, but the author also introduces a character called Dimples Dufus who wants nothing more than to reclaim the fortune that Dimples left behind.


The spiritual wisdom that this author and his fantastic characters impart is truly a lesson in support, kindness, and love - things that some true Christians have forgotten over time. (Yes, that's my opinion so don't send horrible letters to the owner of this site). On a side-note, when characters are named Fartley and Dewdrop Dinkledorf, Ralphy Mayhem, Lilliliver Lipstick, and Father Cowberries, how exactly can a reader go wrong? I am so happy to have been introduced to this author and his series that I really can't wait for Book III: Have a Heart, to be released. Every once in a while a writer comes along who I believe should have more press and publicity, and Mr. Aujurd'hui is the newest one to make that list. Everyone go out and get these books and enjoy!

Author Davis Aujourd'Hui

Sister Mary Olga Book Series:
Book #1 "The Mistadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude"
Book #2 "Babes in Bucksnort"

Review on Funny "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude "

Get ready for non-stop laughs

Are you ready for a class in Advanced Holiness for people from all walks of life? Then, perhaps you're ready to take a trip to the Have A Heart convent in Bucksnort, Wisconsin. There, you'll meet a nun you're not likely to forget - Sister Mary Olga Fortitude.

The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude is a satire with a spiritual message, but there's a lot of hanky panky going on here. Sister Mary Olga is an irreverent nun who has some unique spiritual views that differ from those of the Pope. She's a great believer of "to each, their own." She also loves her Marlboros and her bourbon. Just don't let the Reverend Mother in on her secret. The next class in Advanced Holiness may be canceled.

Here in Bucksnort, you'll meet a zany cast of all-too-human characters. There's a lot of secret-keeping going on here, but Sister Mary Olga will be sure to deliver the goods in order to provide you with good and bad examples of holiness.

The Reverend Mother is a former prostitute. The convent's chef is a gay cowboy. Priscilla Bunhead is the town busybody who opens some other closet doors. She, along with the other folks on Dinkledorf Drive, serve up examples of what not to do.

One thing's for sure. These characters will lighten your load and help you to not take life so seriously. Get ready for non-stop laughs. more..

Get your copy today to begin laughing out loud!