A Hilarious Getaway to Fantasyland

I offer avid readers with a sense of humor to take a hilarious getaway to a fantasyland that will make you forget your troubles. You can do so with the gift of unending laughter. Here's a little tempter to tantalize your humorous taste buds.

"Babes in Bucksnort" is the first sequel to the highly praised "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude". Once again the unconventional bourbon-swilling, chain-smoking nun will spin outrageously funny new tales about the residents of Bucksnort, Wisconsin while she tests the will of a reformed prostitute who just happens to be her Reverend Mother.

Unfortunately there's trouble brewing in the Snortlands. The nasty and notorious town busybody, Priscilla Bunhead, goes on a crusade to stamp out what she calls the gay menace. That's when she convinces her millionaire friend, Mildred Mayflower, to give away her fortune in order to bring the Reverend Billy-Bob Blunthead and his Born Again or Burn Forever Disciples for Jesus to town to do the job. It will be an uphill climb for them when the closet doors of many gay people in the Snortlands burst open. Billy-Bob and his wife, Pinky Poo, will have another battle on their hands when Dimples Dufus, the heiress to the Mayflower fortune, arrives on the scene to reclaim her fortune.

You'll also meet the hilariously bumbling, pothead psychiatrist, Doctor Wally Wacky-Wacko, who creates havoc for one of Sister Mary Olga's favorite fellow nuns. Along with Mildred Mayflower, they become victims of his multi-colored pills that only turn them into zombies. The handsome and virile gay cowboy chef, Randy Cowboy, makes an important self-discovery about his never-ending sexual pursuits when he joins a twelve-step program called Sex Maniacs Notorious.

The irascible Martha Mayhem settles down into comfortable domesticity with her new life partner who happens to be her sister-in law. Martha still manages to stir up trouble on Dinkledorf Drive with her fellow enemies and neighbors, the prudish Priscilla Bunhead and the voluptuous Lula Mae Bunsaplenty. The question that remains is whether Lula Mae's paramour, Jules Jesslike Pappas will put up with her continuing manipulative feminine wiles.

In between the laughs, Sister Mary Olga continues to dispense nuggets of spiritual wisdom during her classes in Beginner's and Advanced Holiness. Just don't take seats near the flatulent child named Fartley Dinkledorf or his lecherous one-hundred five year-old grandfather, Poopsy. The bottom line is that everyone is welcome in Sister Mary Olga's classes. Join the diverse cast of zany characters for a joy ride that will tickle your funny bone until it aches.

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

"The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude" - Book 1

"Babes in Bucksnort" - Book 2

A DINLKELDORF ENCOUNTERS MAYHEM

Every once in awhile, we all encounter a form of mayhem in our lives on our ways to self-discovery. In the case of some of my characters in Bucksnort, Wisconsin, mayhem comes in different forms. First, there is the irascible Martha Mayhem. She is well-named since she is constantly looking for trouble. She is always at odds with her arch enemy, Priscilla Bunhead, the town snoop and gossip.

Priscilla wears her stringy hair in a tight little bun. Martha comes to especially hate that bun when Priscilla forms an organization called Bunheads Unite Now – BUN. She recruits vulnerable females who are looking for someone to do their thinking for them. Much to Martha's chagrin, this also includes some of her relatives. Martha later seeks revenge upon proud Prissy and beheads the bun of a shrieking Priscilla.

Mayhem is encountered in a different form when Diddles Dinkledorf and Mark Mayhem are young and horned-up teens. As they experiment with their sexualities, Mark learns that he enjoys Diddle's Dinkledorf where the sun don't shine. This becomes a life-long passion for the two later aging men who maintain that they are straight. It takes them nearly a lifetime to come to accept that they are gay.

Oh, it all starts out innocently enough. Their trysts take place in the abandoned outhouse of Sister Mary Olga's parents, Platitude and Fullove Fortitude. When the young Mary Olga catches them in the act, she acquires a secret knowledge that she later holds over Diddles' head in order to blackmail him.

Diddles works as a craftsman at the convent where Mary Olga subsequently becomes a nun. She has him fashion a custom-made crucifix that is hollow and contains a flip-top. Given her passion for having secret nips of Old Granddad bourbon, she now has a ready flask for her heavenly spirits.

The older Sister Mary Olga finally decides to blow Mark's cover, thinking she should do her duty to inform Mark's wife that she is married to a closet case. Marjorine Mayhem doesn't turn out to appreciate this knowledge. Seeking comfort, it ends up driving her into the arms of her sister-in-law, Martha. That's when Mayhem encounters Mayhem in a different form of the love that dares to speak its name. The two women discover that they too are gay once they indulge in a passionate kiss.

Life often mimics fiction and can even be stranger than it. Many of the characters in Bucksnort come to embrace their God-given sexualities as they learn to appreciate the diversity of life. Yes, life is indeed a journey full of differing self-discoveries.

You probably won't discover that you are gay unless you already possess those secret fantasies. Irregardless, you may come to embrace some of your own secret behaviors as you come to the understanding of those things within yourselves that need healing. My characters will help you make these discoveries in the most humorous ways.

Learn to accept all of yourselves as you make the journey to fuller self-discovery. Just try not to judge yourselves too harshly. The point is to not take yourselves too seriously. Just come to accept that you are human and that both you and life are good. In the meantime, laugh yourselves silly as you embark on your journeys to Bucksnort!

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

"The Misadventures of Sister Mary Sister Olga Fortitude" Book 1

"Babes in Bucksnort" Book 2

SUCH GOOD SISTERS-IN-LAW

Once upon a time, in the sleepy little village of Bucksnort, Wisconsin, there lived a family named Mayhem. The elder sister, Martha, lived up to her last name. The other sisters were more demure. They will not be the subject of this article.

Martha also had a brother named Mark Mayhem who liked to diddle on the side with his good buddy, Diddles Dinkledorf. Ever since they had been teens, the two of them would furtively sneak away and Diddles would perform the the unmentionable upon Mark. Of course, neither of them admitted to being homosexuals. They were both married men.

Mark eventually married a shy, but lovely lady named Marjorine Butterworth. She had cornflower blue eyes and lovely brown hair that fell in soft curls around her face. They lived happily for many years until Marjorine felt Mark pulling away from her.

She had no idea what that was about and she was too timid to confront him. It wasn't until the day that Sister Mary Olga Fortitude spilled the beans about Mark's relationship with Diddles that Marjorine saw the light. Marjorine was not pleased!

She sought solace with her sister-in-law, Martha Mayhem – the most unlikely candidate to show anyone compassion. That's when an unexpected and beautiful thing happened. The two of them fell into each others' arms. Before they knew what they were doing, they kissed passionately. It was the beginning of a previously unknown fire within each of them that kindled itself on a cold winter's day.

Marjorine left her bewildered husband and moved in with Martha. Martha became a typical butch lesbian. She came to wear her graying hair in a bristle top brush cut. She always wore jeans along with a signature flannel shirt and she frequently sported alligator cowboy boots. The unlikely couple formed a relationship that was made in heaven.

Of course, that only stirred another fire in the neighborhood. Right next door to them lived the town prude, Priscilla Bunhead. As these latent lesbians began to bloom, Priscilla began her witch hunt against gay people. It would just become a matter of time before all of the closeted gay people of the Snortlands began to nudge their closet doors open as Priscilla waged a wicked campaign. This became a case when fear brought about the unexpected in these people. They found a courage within them they had never known they had possessed.

Read about this and the unfolding tales of the Babes in Bucksnort in the book bearing that title. In this and the preceding book, The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude, you will encounter zany characters and outrageous scenarios that will keep you laughing in stitches. Perhaps you will begin to find the humor within your own life. If you do, my purpose within these books will be fulfilled.

Enjoy your journey to Bucksnort.

Author Davis Aujourd'Hui

Sister Mary Olga Book Series

"The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Foritude"

"Babes in Bucksnort"